Well, it has been nearly 3 weeks since I've written on this blog. Not intentional. I've just been busy trying to figure out what the Lord wants me to write about. I have a lot of things going on in my head that sometimes it makes it hard for me to just STOP and take time out to hear from the Lord.
That's when the Lord usually has to hit me upside the head. Of course I mean that figuratively and not literally, but he has to get my attention somehow.
Recently my "Jesus Calling" devotional said:
"You yearn for a simplified lifestyle, so that your communication with Me can be uninterrupted. But I challenge you to relinquish the fantasy of an uncluttered world. Accept each day just as it comes, and find Me in the midst of it all. Do not let your to-do list (written or mental) become an idol directing your life."
Boing!!
That was me hitting myself upside the head after the Lord gently nudged my heart and said, "This is what you have been doing."
I love a to-do list. That's pretty much how I start my day, everyday. What to-do, what to-do. But recently I felt the Lord say that my to-do list was becoming my focus for the day and that I was losing sight of what He had for me. My to-do list was taking precedence over my relationship with Jesus.
So I stopped. I stopped making a list everyday and have made an effort to start my day saying, "Lord, what do you have for me today?" I feel a lot more at peace and have stopped feeling like I have to get everything done that day. That's hard for me. When I want something done, I want it done now!
Patience, my friend, patience. That is what the Lord has been building in me since graduation. I just recently got my authorization to take my RN licensure exam. I only had to wait nearly a month after I graduated for it. I still have no job prospects while I have many friends who have already signed on the dotted line. I also have a lot of things waiting in the wings, so to speak, that are all contingent on what kind of job I get and what kind of hours I have to work. But I can't go there. I cannot get ahead of the Lord. Patience, my friend, patience.
I'm trying. I've swapped my to-do list for some sweet time with the Lord and have been praying for more patience!
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